The "Parents' Stuff" Dilemma

There has been a shift in how people handle the belongings they inherit from their parents and older generations. In the past, collections such as dinnerware, books and antiques were passed down and these possessions were an important part of the family story. It was mostly assumed these items would remain in the family forever. Now, however, people are more likely to furnish homes based on their own tastes and styles, and not waiting to receive their grandmother's china service for 12. By the time the family items are ready to be passed along, they are often not wanted or needed. This cultural phenomena has been well studied and written about, such as this Medium article by John Petrucelli.

So where does that leave us? For many of us, it leads to clutter and guilt. Sure, there are always those favorite items we keep and cherish, but what about the rest? We feel like even if we don't keep it all, we need to do something meaningful with it. Dropping it off by the carload at the thrift store donation door feels so cold and heartless. Giving things away on Freecycle or Buy Nothing to people who might really need them can be a good option, but arranging pickups usually turns into a whole logistics problem. It would be great to sell some of it, and at least be able to make a little money. We are trying this with the Franktiques case at Needful Things. But the market for antiques is tough, since so many of us are in the same boat. Some people have good luck with yard sales, but the last few I tried to do were pretty much a bust. What about donating to a museum? Maybe, but most of the "rare and priceless heirlooms" are not quite as rare or priceless as the family lore has led you to believe. In reality, a lot of it just ends up like this:

This all has to be worth something, right?

Let me tell you about my mother's chair. My mother had this little wooden chair, which had become too rickety to sit on, even for a child. Most of my life, it held dolls or stuffed animals. After my parents died, this chair came home with me. Looking at the faded hand-painted name, I realized it said Mary Ellen. My mother's name was spelled Merry Ellen. Hey, I thought, this wasn't even originally my mother's chair. My grandmother must have found it at a yard sale, figured the name was close enough, and brought it home, because that's very much something my grandmother would have done. So now I could get rid of it and not feel so bad about it, right? We even offered it to a friend whose name is actually Mary Ellen. Then a little while later, I was going through yet another box of items, including a letter from my aunt to my mother that mentioned the chairs. Their grandmother (my great-grandmother) had, in fact, handmade these chairs for some of the children, which then debunked my yard sale theory. So, of course, I still have the chair, and don't know what to do with it.

My mother's childhood chair, with her name spelled wrong by her grandmother

Have you found any creative solutions for all the family items that have been passed down? We'd love to hear about it in the comments below!